About the last month, I've tried to keep this blog full of positives and our darling little boys. It's worked pretty well, yes? In reality, I've had a lot of things on my mind, and feel like I'm on an emotional roller coaster. Mostly about how things are going to work the next few years with school. I guess if you don't talk to me often, or don't see my Facebook updates, you wouldn't know that I'm headed back to school this fall.
In March, I applied to the Ultrasound program. It is a partnered program between Intermountain Health Care and a local community college. I'd applied to an ultrasound program back when I was a sophomore in college, and got shot down. About a year after that, Marsh and I got married, and then I got pregnant with Chan 3 months before finishing my 4 year degree, so that plan was put on hold. Since IHC would pay for my school since I am employed by them, I decided that now was a good time to apply. I have no idea how many applied, but I do know that they interviewed probably around 80-100. There were 9 different interview times with 9 people in my group interview. I tried not to hold my breath because they were only accepting 16 students into the program.
About a month ago, I found out that I actually got in! I felt a crazy range of emotions from excitement and sense of accomplishment to pure guilt. Let me explain further. In order for IHC to pay for my school, I have to continue working 24 hours a week. On top of that, the program is 2 years, year round. The first semester isn't too bad. 3 days of classes, 4 hours. It's after that when it gets to be intense. Each semester after that is a class and anywhere from 24-32 hours a week in clinicals.
A few weeks ago, I called around to preschool daycares to get rates. They were staggering. Then I started having the complex in thinking that I was a terrible, selfish mom for not being at home with my kids, because that's where I'm supposed to be? I've had a few comments from other people that have hurt me in this way, but I've come to the realization that I love my kids and that's what matters. It doesn't matter what other people think. I wondered who would be able to watch them for me, and what would happen when Chandler goes to kindergarten next year.
I've also realized that I'm not going to be able to take on near as much with my Babes and Kids blog and it makes me sad. After almost 2 years, it's grown from a fun hobby to a bit of a business with extra income for our family each month. I really enjoy doing it and the neat experiences that it's given me.
After much bawling on the phone to family and talking to Marsh, I realized that it will all be ok and work out. I'm lucky to have such a supportive husband that is ok with it. He's even said that he's not sure how everything will work out, but he's behind me 100%. Love that man. The next two years might be crazy, but I know I will make it through. I know there's some things that I still have to work out, and luckily I have some of the babysitting worked out for this fall. I guess at this point, I just have to take a deep breath and take it a day at a time. Trust in the Lord and spend lots of quality time with the kids and Marsh when I have it. I am so excited to be doing something that I've wanted to do, it's just the time thing that gets to me. School starts August 25th and I could really use some encouraging words.
I've also realized that I'm not going to be able to take on near as much with my Babes and Kids blog and it makes me sad. After almost 2 years, it's grown from a fun hobby to a bit of a business with extra income for our family each month. I really enjoy doing it and the neat experiences that it's given me.
After much bawling on the phone to family and talking to Marsh, I realized that it will all be ok and work out. I'm lucky to have such a supportive husband that is ok with it. He's even said that he's not sure how everything will work out, but he's behind me 100%. Love that man. The next two years might be crazy, but I know I will make it through. I know there's some things that I still have to work out, and luckily I have some of the babysitting worked out for this fall. I guess at this point, I just have to take a deep breath and take it a day at a time. Trust in the Lord and spend lots of quality time with the kids and Marsh when I have it. I am so excited to be doing something that I've wanted to do, it's just the time thing that gets to me. School starts August 25th and I could really use some encouraging words.
16 comments:
I think being pressed for time makes people more efficient than when they have all the time in the world. If you remember to keep your priorities straight, everything will fall into place. This is an awesome opportunity, 2 years, and you will have so many doors opened. Do what you feel is right and run with it!!! Plus you are very smart, school won't be too demanding because you've got the brains! Two thumbs up from me!
Congrats Tiff for getting in! It will probably be hard but also rewarding in the end. Good luck!
Aw Hon, been there, LIVING that!! I'll say it here, anyone who gives you crap about not being a SAHM can just suck it!!! It is not always possible for every family to have that 1950's Leave it to Beaver idealistic lifestyle!!! I am a WOHM (as you know). I am a nursing student (as you know). And the little boys are thriving with it all!!
Congrats for getting into such a competitve program and WOOHOO for have the tuition covered--that's HUGE!!!
You can do it, Tiffany!!
Tiffany, It is NOT selfish at all. It will be hard for a couple of years, but it is a back up and security for your family. You would fall into that category that you have a skill if heaven forbid, anything ever happened to your family. You have already seen the positive side of having marketable skills when unfortunately your spouse was unemployed for awhile.
I can think of a handful of people in my ward that have had a hard time finding jobs because they had nothing to fall back on after losing their spouse's income, either to a physical disability, death, or divorce... none of those things will happen to your man... I am certain of it.:-)
You can do it. Just be very organized and get rest when you can! It's all very exciting I think.
Wow!! Once again I just have to say you're super mom! I am honestly impressed that you would go to all the effort to finish your goals. School is one thing I haven't gotten to do and would like to...but I haven't even started. Someday! CONGRATS on getting accepted. Seriously what a great feeling that must have been! Seems like you're meant to go now. On a side note, if you need help with your boys I'm close and available. I'm home most of the time so if you need me as an option I'd be more than happy!!! Just let me know.
Wow, Tiff! That's so exciting! I am so impressed by you. You are doing what the Lord wants and what the prophets have taught - getting , or should I say furthering, your education. It doesn't matter that you already have a degree...learning never stops. Kudos to you for taking the initiative to expand your skills!
Step back from the worries and realize how fortunate you are. Good family, good husband, good kids, good health, good job, and good opportunities coming your way. It will all work out. So many people would trade shoes with you.
I'm not going to lie to you, its gonna be tough, but YOU WILL get through it. Finishing up my student teaching while having to leave Carson was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Every morning when he would cry "Mommy, don't go!" it would break my heart. Somedays I felt horrible leaving my little boy just so I could go teach a bunch of teenage girls how to sew. But, I would have to tell myself that I was doing it for him...for the security of having a marketable job if anything were ever to happen to Jeff.
You are smart, and you will get through it. You have lots of people here to help you and give you encouragement. Plus, I'm looking forward to getting your boys one day a week this Fall. It's finally time for me to pay you back for all the babysitting you did for me when I was student teaching.
You've been given such a wonderful opportunity to do what you've always wanted to! Someway or another, everything will fall into place.
I think it's awesome you're going back to school and it really sets a good example for your boys on the importance of education. I'm sure 2 years sounds like a long time now, but in the long run it isn't! As for those people giving you the negative comments, their will always be people who don't like how you do things. I've had strange comments from people because I'm a stay at home mom. You just have to ignore those people and do the best thing for you and your family. Good luck to you and congratulations!
No doubt in my mind that you can handle it all. Of course there will be an occasional break down, but I think that is to be expected. Two years will fly by, and you will be so glad that you did it later on. I'm sure of it. You can do it!!
Tiffany, you have had a lot of good advice from friends and family and I honestly don't know what I could add. You have an ammazing support group and you will do just fine. Speaking from experience the two years will fly by. Look 2010 is about half over, where did it go. Your number one things is to be organized and plan ahead with your hubby.
tiff- I've never been a stay-at-home mome, our finances right now require me to work, and for awhile i felt a horrible guilt, but then i realized that i also have to take care of myself and my family, and as long as you take care of yourself, as a wife and mother, and make time for your sweet boys and hubby, it will all work out.
Remember all that we have been taught, and to rely upon the Savior, read your scriptures and not only will it all work out but you will grow and become the person you need to be. come what may and love it. good luck with your amazing opportunity.
Tiffany you really are supermom!!! I can't even do half of the stuff you do in a day. I really don't know how you do it all (and on little sleep too) I'm sure that if you've prayed about it and feel like it's the right thing then the Lord will help you through it! It really will go fast.
Don't worry about the stupid comments, no matter what anyone does, there's someone out there that doesn't approve. A few weeks ago my hair stylist bit his tongue when he blurted out "your JUST a stay at home mom" without thinking first. People are so rude, and it's none of their business anyways!
I think you are an amazing woman! Always so busy, but still such a good mom! I admire people that can make the sacrifice to follow their dreams! Go for it! You have the right attitude! Everything will work out!
Your kids will be fine. You love them. You are a very good mother and you are doing what is best for your family. What more can you do? Your kids will watch you and they will learn the value of hard work. Congratulations on getting into such a competitive program! You are amazing!
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